Looking for a serene getaway while touring the beautiful vistas of southern Afghanistan’s Kandahar Air Field? Look no further than Kandahar Poo Pond. To the New York Times, it’s a “lake-sized pool of human excrement that fills a section of the sprawling American and NATO base,” but to us, it’s so much more. Conveniently located by Kandahar International Airport — known for its wonderful skin-exfoliating sandstorm treatments — and surrounded by
the Taliban miles of endless sheds, barracks, and storehouses, the Kandahar Poo Pond is your No. 1 locale for rest and relaxation in the sunny province, your home away from home.
But don’t take our word for it, just read the Google reviews!
Scott Fisher — “Some joker decided that our weekly 6 a.m. run should take in a scenic jaunt past poo pond. It’s amazing how quick the pace picked up and even the lardys from HQ managed to break into a slow jog.”
Justin Dunn — “Nothing like visiting KAF after three months of building a new OP… They have this amazing pond, which smells a little funny but is always warm and makes your skin tingle! I highly recommend visiting and taking a dip!”
BJ Pringle — “Great tourist site! Wonderful smell and I caught a glimpse of the fabled poo pond shark! Stay vigilant!”
Wayne Parsons — “Whether you were dining on ‘fine’ Far East cuisines, imbibing a fantastic Tim Horton’s beverage, or just taking in the wonders of natures call through a stroll on KAF, the poo pond offered so many opportunities for memories to be seared in your mind, that I am sad to hear of its passing. The experiences that were had there, can only be shared through the oral traditions now, sadly leaving the fecal out of the equation. RIP Poo pond… may the Rip Its and Far East curry meals that helped fill you never be forgotten either…”
Damion Dawe — “Hitting the pond up for a romantic walk with 30 sweaty men, good times!”
John Bartraw — “The lovely smells when you wake up in South Park are truly missed. 5/5 stars, would visit again. If you don’t sit next to the poo pond at sunset to hear the gentle sounds of poo water crashing on the sides, you’re not doing KAF right. Why go to the boardwalk when there’s a perfectly lovely pond right here?”