Military service obviously comes with considerable bodily risk — there’s all that service abroad, at sea, or in a no-shit warzone… plus hazardous training.
But sometimes you end up getting hurt because you just liked the idea of a drunken night run in a gas mask to the base bar before it closed. Or you decided that stand-up jousting on a rolly chair in the barracks was a great new sport.
Not, uh, that we at Task & Purpose have any experience there.
But, knowing that not every war wound is, you know, a war wound, we turned to you, our loyal readers, to tell us about the dumb things you did to end up at sick call, where an exhausted medic or corpsman was on hand to toss out Motrin and sage advice like “Change your socks, and don’t do that again, idiot.”
Here are ten dumb ways to hurt yourself while in the military. (Or anywhere, really; some of these are just: Wow.)
“I’ll give you $40 if you…”
That wouldn’t have happened if you’d worn your safety belt.
Lieutenant: “Follow me, guys!”
“That guy came outta nowhere.”
Two words: buffer rodeo.
“Sure, I’ll just whip my junk out. What could go wrong?”
The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs paid $13,000 over a three-month period for a senior official's biweekly commute to Washington from his home in California, according to expense reports obtained by ProPublica.
Staff Sgt. John Eller conducts pre-flights check on his C-17 Globemaster III Jan. 3 prior to taking off from Hickam Air Force Base, Hawaii for a local area training mission. Sgt. Eller is a loadmaster from the 535th Airlift Squadron. (U.S. Air Force photo/Tech. Sgt. Shane A. Cuomo)
CUCUTA, Colombia — The Trump administration ratcheted up pressure Saturday on beleaguered Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro, dispatching U.S. military planes filled with humanitarian aid to this city on the Venezuelan border.
U.S. Secretary of Defense Patrick Shanahan speaks at the annual Munich Security Conference in Munich, Germany February 15, 2019. REUTERS/Andreas Gebert
ABOARD A U.S. MILITARY AIRCRAFT (Reuters) - Acting U.S. Defense Secretary Patrick Shanahan said on Saturday he had not yet determined whether a border wall with Mexico was a military necessity or how much Pentagon money would be used.
President Donald Trump on Friday declared a national emergency in a bid to fund his promised wall at the U.S.-Mexico border without congressional approval.
A pair of U.S. Navy Grumman F-14A Tomcat aircraft from Fighter Squadron VF-211 Fighting Checkmates in flight over Iraq in 2003/Department of Defense
Since the sequel to the 1986 action flick (and wildly successful Navy recruitment tool) Top Gun, was announced, there's been a lot of speculation on what Top Gun: Maverick will be about when it premieres in June 2020. While the plot is still relatively unclear, we know Tom Cruise will reprise his role as Naval aviator Pete "Maverick" Mitchell, and he'll be joined by a recognizable costar: The iconic F-14 Tomcat.
It looks like the old war plane will be coming out of retirement for more than just a cameo. A number of recently surfaced photos show an F-14 Tomcat aboard the USS Theodore Roosevelt, alongside Cruise and members of the film's production crew, the Drive's Tyler Rogoway first reported earlier this week.