Get Task & Purpose in your inbox
23 Literal Translations Of Military Graphics That Actually Make Sense
Editor’s Note: A version of this article originally appeared on the blog of Angry Staff Officer.
I know you all are like me; you get excited when new doctrine gets released. Giddy, even. So I know that when the Army released Army Doctrine Reference Publication 1-02 Terms and Military Symbols you immediately downloaded the whole thing and had a good read. Or not.
One thing always strikes me when going through this work is that without context, military operational symbols could look like some really silly things. So, without any more preamble, here is a selection of ADRP 1-02, as seen by extremely literal people.
What it looks like: “Peppermint stick cannon being fired by man in sombrero.”
What it is: “Border Patrol.”
What it looks like: “This box is happy.”
What it is: “Civil Military Cooperation in NATO.”
What it looks like: “Pizza is here!”
What it is: “Coordination Point.”
What it looks like: “Get in the box.”
What it is: “Customs Service.”
What it looks like: “Be on the lookout for giant handguns on skateboards.”
What it means: “Drive by Shooting.”
What it looks like: “Sun wearing sunglasses, ironically.”
What it is: “Friendly Forces Encircled.”
What it looks like: “Absolutely no seagulls allowed!”
What it is: “Airborne infantry unit.”
What it looks like: “Guy with sunglasses and cigarette is unhappy.”
What it means: “Launcher unmanned aerial system.”
What it looks like: “We don’t know what this thing is, but it is pissed OFF.”
What it is: “Marine Expeditionary Force.”
… That’s actually spot-on.
What it looks like: “Bring your coat hangers.”
What it is: “Mine Clearing.”
What it looks like: “Giant bugs here; stay away.”
What it is: “Mine laying.”
What it looks like: “We got a box of aliens.”
What it is: “Minefield, anti-personnel.”
What it looks like: “Absolutely no damn tents allowed.”
What it is: “Mountain infantry unit.”
What it looks like: “We fenced in this fir tree, but just this one.”
What it is: “Multiple rocket launcher.”
What it looks like: “Pirates!”
What it is: “Pirates.”
What it looks like: “Happy sunglasses wearers.”
What it is: “Recovery unmanned aerial system.”
What it looks like: “BEAR CLAW!”
What it is: “Rock throwing.”
What it looks like: “Possible rain in Michigan, bring your crappy umbrella.”
What it is: “Signals intelligence.”
What it looks like: “Top hats worn here.”
What it is: “Surface shelter.”
What it looks like: “Shepherds abiding in their fields.”
What it is: “Flamethrower.”
What it looks like: “Mandatory wear of bow ties.”
What it is: “Army aviation.”
What it looks like: “The wear of nautical themed bow ties is strictly prohibited.”
What it is: “Air naval gunfire liaison company.”
What it looks like: “Very surprised emoji in use in this area.”
What it is: “Air defense gun.”
This article, “Military Graphics: What They SHOULD Mean,” was originally published on the blog of Angry Staff Officer.
More articles from Angry Staff Officer:
An Army veteran from Columbus claimed he suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder after a deployment in Afghanistan that earned him a Purple Heart and Silver Star.
As a result, he collected $76,000 in benefits for the mental condition.
He admitted Wednesday, however, that all of that was a lie.
He was not deployed to Afghanistan, never suffered PTSD and never received the two honors, which are among the highest bestowed for military service.
SAN DIEGO — Days after Rep. Duncan Hunter pleaded guilty to a federal felony related to a yearslong campaign finance scandal, he has finally stated explicitly that he will resign from his congressional seat before the end of his term.
"Shortly after the holidays I will resign from Congress," Hunter, R-Calif., in a statement. "It has been an honor to serve the people of California's 50th District, and I greatly appreciate the trust they have put in me over these last 11 years."
A collision between a Coast Guard boat and a Navy vessel near Kodiak Island, Alaska on Wednesday landed six coasties and three sailors to the hospital, officials said.
The Navy has identified the two Defense Department civilians who were killed in a shooting Wednesday at the Pearl Harbor Naval Shipyard in Hawaii.
A shooting at Naval Air Station Pensacola in Florida has left four people dead, including the gunman, law enforcement officials said at a Friday news conference.
The shooter and two victims were killed at the base and another victim died after being taken to the hospital, said Chip Simmons, deputy chief of the Escambia County Sheriff's Office.
Another seven people remain hospitalized, including two sheriff's deputies who engaged the gunman, Simmons said at Friday's news conference. One was hit in the arm and the other was shot in the knee. Both are expected to recover.