**TO GO WITH STORY SLUGGED MILITARY WIDOWS THE DILEMMA, BY JULIE WATSON AND KEVIN MAURER** Rachelle Vaughn, center, poses with her 18-month-old son Richard next to a picture of her husband, Army Sgt. Richard Vaughn, at their home Tuesday, May 25, 2010 in San Diego. Vaughn, whos husband was killed in Iraq in 2008, said she has felt support from the military after her loss. (AP Photo/Gregory Bull)