Imagine this scenario: You’ve just come out of a firefight, exhausted but unscathed. Coated in sweat and dirt, you reach for your standard-issue canteen for a swig of water — or, if you’re lucky, something a bit stronger. But hot damn, you’re fucked: A piece of shrapnel or spare bullet has punctured your canteen, spilling your water or whisky onto your uniform. Your thirst will go unquenched.
Now, after years of combat-induced sobriety, you can finally enter the battlefield (or, you know, a wedding) without fear of your booze ending up all over your trousers thanks to the most durable flask we’ve ever seen. For anyone who spends their days slogging through the muck, this bad boy is the best liquid delivery system since cavemen discovered they could carry water by cupping their hands.
Created by beloved Scottish whiskey legend Macallan and award-winning watch brand Urwerk, the Macallan X Urwerk Whiskey Flask promises an extra level of protection for that sweet, essential booze with layers of titanium, aluminium, and stainless steel. Even better, the flask contains two separate tanks, so you never have to choose between water and booze ever again.
“Composed of over 150 parts, The Macallan x Urwerk Flask has purposeful complexity and intricacy at its heart; combining the beauty of design with genuine utility,” the company writes. “Reflecting The Macallan’s inherent mastery, intricacy, and individuality combined with Urwerk’s unconventional design approach and revolutionary engineering, this is a statement of what can be achieved when whiskey mastery meets obsessively engineered horology.” Whatever the hell that means.
There’s only one problem with this bad boy: At $2,450 and a 500-unit production run, it’s freakishly expensive. But hey, when it comes to keeping your go-juice safe from the outside world, then it might be worth the investment.
Anyway, here’s some pencil-neck to explain the science behind this thing: