The Ultimate Barracks Lawyer Is Now The Ultimate Barracks Judge

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THIS IS A REAL BILLBOARD

THIS IS A REAL BILLBOARD

The former Army officer behind possibly one of the most absurd legal advertisements in history will now preside over a small segment of the U.S. justice system.

In Guilford County, North Carolina, Attorney Larry L. Archie — a former officer in the North Carolina Army National Guard and current major in the Army Reserve — ousted incumbent District Judge Jonathan Kreider with 57.6 percent of the vote on Election Day.

Sure, a local judicial race is small beans compared to some of the other veteran-heavy races this cycle, but Archie's name should sound familiar: it's because he's the attorney behind this perennially-viral billboard proclaiming, 'Just Because You Did It Doesn't Mean Your Guilty.'

Even better: This is a piece of OJ Simpson-level legal advice we unknowingly posted to the Task & Purpose Instagram feed nottwo f*ckingdays ago.

We congratulate Archie on seemingly ascending from the ranks of lowly barracks lawyer to the level of supreme authority that is a judgeship, and we apologize for incorrectly citing your rank on Instagram.

Now, can you help me negotiate for a higher interest rate on my Mustang or do I have to call Duncan Hunter for legal advice?