U.S. Air Force photo by Staff Sgt. Victor J. Caputo
So you’re stuck in the field, it’s raining — because why the hell wouldn’t it be? — and you’re famished. So you sit down on an overturned Kevlar and reach into your bag for your prized possession: the long-promised pizza MRE. There’s just one problem: It’s completely brown and looks like shit on a slice of cardboard.
All MREs are required to last at least three years while being stored at 80 degrees or below. To test this out, the MREs are placed in a 100-degree box for six months, in order to simulate the three-year requirement.
The pizza MRE flunked that test, turning brown. The discoloration represents more of a quality concern than a safety one, Whitsitt told Defense News, adding that troops could eat the brown pizza, but probably wouldn't want to.
Though disappointing, hiccups like this are to be expected when you’re trying something as brazen and bold as long-lasting pizza in a bag. The pizza MRE was expected to hit shelves in 2018, with both pepperoni and cheese being shipped out to eagerly waiting troops in training and overseas.
The pizza made in Natick’s labs turns out fine, reports Defense News. The issue occurs when it’s mass-produced, and so the timeline has temporarily been scrapped until they figure out how to make all the pizzas look palatable.
Making an immortal cheese pizza, it turns out, is more science than art, with careful consideration paid to each chemical and ingredient added, according to a 2014 Vice article on the MRE. Supermarket cheese contains too much moisture, so it needs to be cut with a shelf-stable cheese product. Tomato sauce leaches into the bread over time, so scientists created a tomato-flavored carbohydrate- and starch-based "barrier technology" that's cut to a square to fit over the pizza MRE, and sandwiched between the two pizza layers.
The MRE has been in the works since 2012, and it’s so desperately sought after that it’s been referred to as the “holy grail.” Which makes sense, given that a truly edible three-year-old pizza would be akin to a biblical miracle.
Benjamin Franklin nailed it when he said, "Fatigue is the best pillow." True story, Benny. There's nothing like pushing your body so far past exhaustion that you'd willingly, even longingly, take a nap on a concrete slab.
U.S. Coast Guard Petty Officer 2nd Class Karl Munson pilots a 26-foot boat while Petty Officer 2nd Class Gabriel Diaz keeps an eye on a boarding team who is inspecting a 79-foot shrimp boat in the Gulf of Mexico, off the coast of New Orleans, La., on April 27, 2005
Radio transmissions to the U.S. Coast Guard are usually calls for help from boaters, but one captain got on the radio recently just to say thanks to the men and women who are currently working without pay.
DOVER AIR FORCE BASE, Del (Reuters) - U.S. President Donald Trump traveled to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware on Saturday to receive the remains of four Americans killed in a suicide bombing in northern Syria.
Trump, locked in a battle with congressional Democrats that has led to a nearly month-long partial government shutdown, announced his trip via a pre-dawn tweet, saying he was going "to be with the families of 4 very special people who lost their lives in service to our Country!"
Former President George W. Bush is calling for an end to the partial government shutdown, which is about to hit the one-month mark and is currently the longest shutdown in US history.
In an appeal made on Instagram, the 43rd president called on "leaders on both sides to put politics aside, come together, and end this shutdown." The caption was posted with an image of him and former First Lady Laura Bush giving pizza to their Secret Service detail.