Sorry, But Research Shows Marriage Is Better For Men Than Being Single

Family & Relationships

Ahh, the single life. There’s nothing better, am I right? You’re rolling in the dough because you don’t have to spend money on anyone else but yourself. You can catch all the ass this glorious world has to offer without worrying about commitment, which basically makes you invincible. Why would a guy ever want to settle down?    


Because those are pipe dreams, my friend. Single life is rarely actually like that. Truth is, married guys are the ones who have it made.

A recent report by the Institute of Family Studies found that married men are actually richer, happier, and healthier than single guys, believe it or not. The report compiles research from a number of recent studies to debunk the “ball and chain” myth surrounding marriage. Basically, as long as you don’t marry a total psycho — which, let’s face it, do tend to prey on young, naive boots — then marriage is probably a smart life decision. That doesn’t mean marry the first woman who ever smiles at you in uniform… or the one you met in a strip club three weeks ago. Don’t do that.

Here are three findings that show married guys are better off than single guys.

Married men make 10 to 40% more money than single men.

According to a number of studies conducted in the United States and other developed countries, married men earn more than singles and for multiple reasons. According to the report, “Married men typically work harder, smarter, and more successfully. They are less likely to be fired. And they make about $16,000 more than their single peers with otherwise similar backgrounds.” In my opinion, that is usually the result of a very smart woman keeping her husband in line, but the research doesn’t get into that.

Marriage also increases the earning power for men at a rate of 10 to 24%. In other words, you’re worth more when you’re married. As long as you don’t get divorced. That’s a whole different story that usually ends with you broke and bitter.  

Married men have better sex lives … yes, with their wives.

According to the General Social Survey, single dudes are having a lot less sex compared to men who are married or live with a partner. Apparently, only 37% of single men, aged 20-39, are getting laid twice weekly, compared to 52% of cohabiting men, and 42% of married men. And living in the barracks certainly isn’t helping your cause. No self-respecting lady wants to bone in that closet you call a "bedroom."

... only 37% of single men, aged 20-39, are getting laid twice weekly, compared to 52% of cohabiting men, and 42% of married men.

Bonus news: the quality of sex between married couples is better than random, single sex. A majority of married men find sex “extremely physically pleasurable,” compared to a minority of men who are single.

Married guys are physically and emotionally healthier than unmarried dudes.

Finally, married men live longer — a decade longer, actually. According to the report, “the companionship, the support, and even the nagging that men get from their wives in marriage translate into better physical health.” Now I don’t know happens when you add children into the equation, but the research is clear: Find yourself a mate or you’re going to die alone and sooner than your married comrades.  

DoD photo
(U.S. Army photo)

Army Futures Command will reach fully operational status just before the newest gem of the Army's modernization plan sees its first birthday on August 24th, officials announced on Tuesday.

AFC Commander Gen. John "Mike" Murray told reporters at a technologies showcase on Tuesday that the command will be fully operational on July 31st before showing off everything AFC personnel have been working on over the last year, from night vision goggles and robotic vehicles to new air- and missile-defense capabilities.

Read More Show Less
(Associated Press/Carolyn Kaster)

Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-Calif.) has been told to stop using the Marine Corps' emblem and the 1st Marine Division's motto in his campaign literature, Corps officials confirmed.

The Marine Corps Trademark Licensing Office has sent Hunter, a Marine veteran, a cease and desist letter telling him to quit using the Eagle, Globe, and Anchor emblem along with the phrase, "No Better Friend, No Worse Enemy," on a fundraising mailer that accuses his political opponent of having links to terrorism, NBC News first reported on Wednesday.

Read More Show Less
(Arapahoe County Sheriff's Department)

Arapahoe County sheriff's deputies have arrested a U.S. Army recruiter for investigation of soliciting girls as young as 10 years old for sex after he allegedly sent selfies calling himself "Colorado batman," the sheriff's department reported.

Read More Show Less
(Associated Press/The Fayetteville Observer/Andrew Craft)

An Army appeals court has rejected Bowe Bergdahl's claim that President Trump's public description of him as "a no-good traitor who should have been executed" and other comments on the disgraced soldier's case constituted unlawful command influence (UCI).

Read More Show Less
(Department of Defense photos)

Editor's Note: This article by Gina Harkins originally appeared onMilitary.com, a leading source of news for the military and veteran community.

The Marine Corps must update its parental-leave policies to give new moms and dads time with their newborns, the service's new top general wrote this week, including considering a full year's worth of leave for women who've had a child.

Marines should not be expected to choose between being the best parent possible and their career duties, Commandant Gen. David Berger wrote in his planning guidance released to the force Tuesday.

"These outcomes should never be in competition to the extent that success with one will come at the expense of the other," Berger wrote. "Our parental/maternity leave policies are inadequate and have failed to keep pace with societal norms and modern talent management practices."

Read More Show Less