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Here’s our first Long March contest: Write one sentence of U.S. military jargon that is credible to military personnel yet incomprehensible to civilians. Something like, “I was no-notice tasked to fix a C4ISR problem the divarty S-2 was having, but then some CatFour ND’d his Ma Deuce straight through the brigade satcom power system.” Or this, from a magazine sitting on my desk: “While C4I is a critical element that enables the ARG/MEU SOFLE to accomplish its mission and to maximize SOF-CF I3, the modified program also creates challenges.”

Yes, Long Marchers, you CAN do better than that. You’re smart, you can do things. When you do, please send to: [email protected].

Entrants will be published in this column, and you all will get to vote on a winner, who will get a signed copy of one of my books. Second place gets two books, of course.