Editor's note: A version of this article previously ran on Oct. 28, 2016
Stepping into BDUs and pinning a bunch of valor medals on your chest when you haven't earned them is fucked up, and some states have even tried to make it punishable by fine and prison time.
But Halloween is one out of 365 days where this shouldn't be an issue. It's the only time of year where civilians like me should be able to put on a flight suit and feel like "Top Gun" to escape the sad reality of sitting behind a computer screen for 16 hours a day.
It's that time of year again when we celebrate the end of Fall by putting on elaborate animal costumes and the like and go house to house exchanging merry tunes for food and treats. But for those of you out there who don't celebrate the traditional Gaelic pagan holiday of Samhain on Oct. 31, it will also be Halloween --- the annual celebration of our two greatest national pastimes: capitalism (spending too much money on an elaborate and useless costume that will end up covered in liquor and other stains) and obesity (candy and beer all around!).