Sir, I mustache you a question haha no but seriously I lost my rifle have you seen it anywhere? 

Military grooming standards in garrison can be confusing. What can I do with my facial hair in the Army? Am I allowed to have a mustache in the military? How come Special Forces is always allowed to have a beard and all I rate is this nasty c*ck broom? 

These are all great questions, we all knew the guy in your platoon that had a mustache. He was creepy, he put cans of rip-its in his camel back, he gave you shoulder rubs when you least needed them. 

Edited by: Rebecca Rosen